Badpuppy Gay Today

Monday, 30 March 1998


A Troma Film Review by Warren Arronchic


Team Troma, filmmakers famed for their bloody mixtures of horror and comedy, have done themselves proud with the release of Killer Condom, a title-take-off that rivals, perhaps, Killer Tomatoes. Billed as a 1998 release, Killer Condom showcased recently at San Francisco's Castro Theatre and later—without any notice of an adult rating—on Cinemax.

Previous Troma fare has included such box-office blowhards as Toxic Avenger I, II, and III and The Class of Nuke-Em High, I, II, and III.

Team Troma is proud of its long history of showcasing Gay, Lesbian and Bisexual cinema. "This phenomenon," say the Troma people, "stems primarily from our pledge to fight for world peace and equality through celluloid."

As early as Sugar Cookies (1972) the first and only erotic lesbian drama produced by Hollywood heavies Oliver Stone and Lloyd Kaufman, Troma has produced deep, sympathetic portrayals of gays.

Killer Condom, starring Udo Samel, is set in Manhattan with English subtitles, though the dialogue is in campy German. Psychotic prophylactics, explains a Gannett TV guide, terrorize men at a New York hotel.

The hotel, a gimpy brothel, is a locale where the condoms rest at bedsides in profusion. Those who place them on or near their private parts get those parts eaten alive. Johns are found bleeding profusely after the penis-gobbling condoms jump to gobble their genitals. Prostitutes, not condoms, become the first suspects.

A detective is called onto the case. He's a city-weary, balding Sicilian with a thirteen-inch penis. This detective is named Macaroni—but the beautiful male prostitute with whom he attempts to copulate (until getting his left nut bitten off by a killer condom) prefers to call him just "cop".

The hustler, a joy to behold, is stricken with the love bug after a particularly bizarre scene in which the detective's penis rises in full glory, casting a large dark shadow over the handsome boy's face. The boy has never seen such a big one, and in spite of a vast difference in the appearances of these two men (the detective being a 40ish frump) their feelsy feelings race toward a long-term romance.


In one wacko episode they make love in the brothel-hotel's elevator while a host of irritable one-night-standers wait impatiently in the lobby for their lift, watching the elevator stop at every level except theirs.

When the elevator finally opens, following the consummation of the two love-makers' tryst, there's little public malice, however, and even some applause for the two men's impulsive, devil-daring, passion-consumed elevator feat.

It remains for the one-nutted detective to solve the killer condom mystery.

There's a woman doctor, he finds, who is also a fundamentalist-style religious fanatic. She's hell-bent on punishing all fornicators prior to the return of the Lord, which she expects momentarily.

At one point she gives a rousing fundamentalist speech chastising the sexually errant, calling homosexual relations a perverse lifestyle and justifying her attempt to eliminate gays with the special condoms that her captive mad scientist has invented.

Killer Condom does a bang-up job jibbing at fundamentalist loonies, Republican presidential hopefuls and similar overly-judgmental dregs that make society the madhouse it is.

The film lampoons straight macho mores. There are once-macho transvestites like Babette (formerly Bob) and very funny drag shows—including one particularly hilarious lipsinc number, Teach Me Tiger. Troma execs boast of their previous works that: "Before Pricilla was Queen of the Desert. Troma took Miss X, Queen of Tromaverse and transvestite star of Vegas in Space, to the Cannes Film Festival."

Among the strangest moments in this film is Detective Macaroni's gay activist speech, delivered with droll passion.

You can find out what you need to know about ordering or seeing Killer Condom on the Team Troma web site. Just pull it up--- ---and scroll down to click on the movie makers' gay and lesbian fare, titled "Troma's Gay, Lesbian and Bisexual Closet."

Killer Condom, in spite of some gory clips, ends happily—with "Cop" and the pretty- boy prostitute walking into a virtual sunset along a Manhattan street.

© 1998 BEI; All Rights Reserved.
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